Home > Uncategorized > Entry for May 14, 2009

Entry for May 14, 2009

Diversity doesn’t go far at Santa Fe College. They have dropped the word community I hope you notice.
The committee I had to appear in front of at 8:30 A.M. was comprised of 2 women and 2 men. There was an age difference but everyone was white. There was no muslim, no black and certainly not one of those followers of the path. If you think there is a prejudice because you follow the path, they just deny that and go on with their business.
My boss at News and Journalism, the woman who hired me for work/study, had a Stephen Foster screen saver. I believe it was a christian thing. I don’t know about Foster’s relationship to christianity, but if Astrid wanted to remind herself of Christ’s presence with a little screensaver I had nothing against that.
I am well aware of Jesus’ message of faith and I dont think I needed to ask Asrtid about Jesus or what he taught. siddha Yoga and the teachings of India are a little different. I welcome questions about Siddha Yoga, what I mean is I welcome an interest. It’s friendly to explore another’s religious points of view. It would have been nice if someone in the office knew Baba Muktananda or read Play of Consciousness. It would have been nice if a teacher had been familiar with Baba or the miraculous happenings Indian’s claim of their Gurus and their meditation. It might have put me at ease.
Nothing of the sort ever happened at Santa Fe. They saw that I believe as separation of church and state as if my Guru had been Pope and taunted all of Europe with his power. Or as if Gurumayi, his devoted disciple, had led the Salem witch trials that scared the hell out of New England in the early days of the colonies.
This evening, as I considered how I am treated, often like a young person, which most students are, I came to wonder if this is about the Punk movement. I never followed that much and I still think of myself more as a hippie but I guess Punk fits the bill to a tee. There were no representative of Punk on the Disciplinary Committee, either.
There were no hispanics.
I think sexuality was big on their mind. No gays were represented. Did I say that? There is a question on the disciplinary form as to whether you had to register as a sexual predator. That was very relevant since I had been arrested for indecent exposure. The possession of cannabis which the public defender found so important and had me plead guilty to for the dropping of the charge of indecent exposure didn’t seem so important. This was back in 1983.
When I think of 1983 I alwasy think of Baba. Baba took mahasamadhi in 1982, October. In May of 1983, it had only been 7 months since Baba took his mahasamadhi and installed Gurumayi.
There were no questons of course about a night in 1988 when I was accosted by 2 young country boys outside a tavern in my own home town and they didn’t even know about a fellow I knew popping out of a fancy new black vehicle in front of a convenience store and calling me a faggot. I had confided that incident to Ms. Michelle Ratliff in our e-mail conversations. My homosexual tendencies and how to deal with them only ended up in my being introduced to Mr. Lazin and being suspended.
Other things I discussed with Ms. Ratliff included the murder of the daughter of the custodian from Hawthorne High School which had made front page news in the Gainesville Sun. I confess, Ms. Ratliff didn’t write back very often. I had assumed, though, this was because her classes kept her very busy. Ms. Ratliff was very much like a friend I had in the 70’s who went to the University of Florida and dated one of the pot heads who counted himself as a close personal friend of mine. Her name was Carol and she was from Hollywood. Carol’s university experience sometimes put me off and it could have been the same with Ms. Ratliff. I was on the other hand, madly in love with Carol and it came to blows with the pot head who counted himself one of my friends.
I had been suspended from the university for poor scholarship. I only had a 1.2 GPA and I couldn’t make it a 2.o. I confessed that, too, to the teacher of Intro to the Internet, the online version. I might have stated these things on the boards but I think they were watched like hawks. Nobody posted to the Santa Fe Discussion Boards. Speaking of such boards that was another discussion with Ms. Ratliff. I had suffered on discussion boards, such as Mother Jones’ Live Wire. Nobody liked me talking about the path, the Guru or meditation. Ms. Ratliff assured me it was not likely anyone on the boards would ever be able to find me, unless I gave them my phone number and address. Things got so close on the boards though that I did feel afraid. The boards were sort of a lifeline for me, was the thing and so to be thrown off a board or something was a very painful thing. My imagination simply helped that idea with the threat of someone really appearing and crushing my fingers, as one poster at Live Wire threatened to do.

time for a snack. You know my diabetes, but really I’m just tired and a little hungry.

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